brandi thompkins

I’m sitting here eating a biscuit AND french fries not giving a damn

AND IT FEELS SO GOOD

mark my words.

I will never EVER move anywhere where is gets below 32 degrees for more than one month out of the year. or more than two weeks at a time.

If I decide to ever go against this, please advise me of this post.

I’ve just had a revelation about people.

I determined just now that everything about a person can be determined by the way that they handle their car. I should have realized this about two years ago when I accepted a date invitation from a guy that I met out one night. He seemed nice and asked to take me to the movies so I felt that it was sincere enough and I would accept. I was angry at myself for being a little shallow for judging him when he drove up to pick me up that night. Not because his car wasn’t nice enough. I’m sure it was. but it was red.

and it was a sports car.

Now, I almost wouldn’t care if he would have picked my up on a moped, that would have been sort of endearing, but the red sports car? It was the deal breaker. From the beginning. I cannot explain it, but it threw me off. This guy actually went out and picked this red sports car. I’m sure the rap cds stuck up on the ceiling of it didn’t help either, but regardless, that car told me everything I needed to know about this guy. and of course, my theory was proved during our only date. 

and today, while I was trying to merge, this particular truck, a man and wife inside, would not let me over. They could have easily without inconvenience slowed so our car could merge. But on purpose, they did not. The man was driving. Not just that, they did not slow down in order to not crush the car that was in front of them, but instead kept the speed and forced that car in front of them to drive way over the speed limit.

It baffled me that a man would drive like this with a woman in his passenger seat. and I thought to myself, I can tell you without a doubt what sort of marriage they have. He is controlling and she feels dominated. Or they are just both assholes.

Next time you are out dirving, look at it.

I should write books on philosophy. 

I wish i could major in something cool.

like stand up comedy. or casserole making. not “cooking.” but specifically casserole making.

“What are you going to school for?”  “Christmas Ribbon Tying. I’m going to tie Christmas Ribbons for a living.”

I was bound and determined to not write anything too personal in this.
and thus far, I’ve stuck to it to a degree.
But I’ve decided that today, I’m going to make this a little more personal.

I made a commitment to someone a little over a year ago. We both vowed to keep a commitment to each other, and due to selfishness, jealousy, or the loss of the concern we had for each other in the beginning…whatever the reason has been, something that could have been pure, simple, and could have allowed two people to grow in a relationship with each other, with God, and with the world, has done the very opposite.

and I’m not writing because it’s something I necessarily need to get off my chest. I’m not writing for sympathy or for any other reason, other than to reflect on what ground has been lost.
and not just a loss for two people in a relationship,
but a loss for two individual people. and just like I vowed to another person one year ago, I’m vowing to myself. Something I should have done a long time ago. I’m vowing to do the things that make me happy. I’m vowing to do the things that I’ve ignored for months. I’m vowing not to embrace apathy anymore.
and by fixing me, I can fix us. Not because I assume that we will be perfect, because at this point, I can’t assume anything.
but I can fix us, because no matter what happens in the “end,” I will be able to look him, and everyone else in the eyes and say that whatever we have, whether it be friendship, or a deep love, is true.
I challenge everyone, and I’m included in this, that if you love someone, be it a friendship, or a meaningful relationship or hell, a cat, don’t forget to love yourself. Don’t forget the things that are important to you. Whether it is reading, working out, wearing your favorite outfits, your friendships, or your relationship with God, do not forget them. I’m proof in the pudding that it’s so easy to do so (i.e. + 20 lbs)
Not just that, encourage each other to be whole. Whatever that may mean to you.
I’m learning now, more than ever, to throw away everything that makes me apathetic. Roadblock relationships, untruth, nachos, and simple stupidity.

I’ve also determined, with great sadness, that getting rid of netflix, was the worst decision I’ve ever made.